Books and Arts – 27 March 2014

‘Hey, not too much salt, love!’
‘It’s outrageous the way the British cabinet’s been invaded by Old Etonians.’
‘Ignore Barry. He’s a born attention-seeker.’
‘It’s the anger management counsellor — she’s furious that you missed your appointment.’
‘Botox means never having to show you’re sorry.’
‘By “over the top” we mean charge the enemy, not wear an extravagant costume.’
‘...yes...head of diversity...’
‘It’s been brought to my attention that you’ve been breaking your vow of silence.’
‘Have you tried throwing it out and getting a new one?’
‘I can’t give you any money until it’s been approved by our members.’