Spectator competition: a plate of corbynara with your lucasaid, anyone? (plus: a reply from his coy mistress)

The late Sir Keith Joseph once gave a speech in which he said that the government was trying to ‘Bennboozle’ the country. You were asked to submit coinages inspired by today’s politicians, supplying full dictionary definitions and illustrative examples of their use. As is often the case with this sort of competition, many of you were thinking along similar, albeit entertaining lines. Charles Curran, Barry Baldwin and R.M. Goddard all coined harmanise though with varying definitions, and kendalliance and corbynate also cropped up several times. I was tickled by Basil Ransome-Davies’s faragiste (a chancer or failed opportunist, one who does not live up to his own publicity); D.A. Prince’s decameron (a fictional tale spun to an admiring and uncritical audience) and dorriesible (ludicrous, as in ‘there is nothing more dorriesible than a grown woman voluntarily eating bushtucker on television’); and W.J. Webster’s govial (with a courteous but firmly resolute style). In general, the most successful coinages bore some sort of resemblance to an existing word, giving them a ring of instant plausibility. The entries below earn their inventors £15 per definition.

obamarama n. a prodigious display of optimism and belief that captures a following subsequently disillusioned by results; a false dawn. ‘When the World Cup comes around in 2020 we’ll have the usual obamarama for England, then out on penalties in the group stage.’

imputiny n. a privileged status conferring freedom from punishment for a life of crime uniting greed, low animal cunning and brutal violence. ‘Once again Terry was spared a second yellow for a crunching foul. The imputiny goes on.’ G.M. Davis

corbynite n. a rock from the Jurassic period, (igneous in origin but well weathered) often found in boulder form in a sea of mud. Sometimes described as a throwback, as it will be inconsistent with the time period of the surrounding area. (See erratic.) Adj. applied to anyone or anything that seems out of step with the zeistgeist e.g. ‘the flat earth society is corbynite in the extreme’. Katie Mallett

lucasaid n. a pick-me-up that is more attractive than effective. ‘It was an occasion that cried out for a lucasaid — harmless, but pleasant.’ ‘They had no medicine to offer, so they quietened her down with a dose of lucasaid.’ ‘“You could save the planet by swallowing chocolate, or some such lucasaid,” remarked the wizard.’

salmondella n. a fatal dance, one that starts out as a charming collaboration between the participants, but that eventually reveals the murderous intent of one of them. ‘King Richard patted Prince Eddie on the forehead, and led him off into a conversational salmondella.’ ‘She took him into the middle of the disco’s dance-floor, ushering him into the salmondella’s groove, while she quietly unlocked her flick-knife.’ G.S. Roper

corbynaut n. a light-hearted term for a an adventurer in fantasy space; any likable, well-intentioned simpleton; also corbynautic adj.; often confused with corbynut and corbynutter (qv), terms of abuse. ‘The ailing old clergyman’s corbynautic proposal to invite monkeys and murderers to a tea party brought smiles of sympathy from his friends.’

angels and merakels n. the supposed solution when all else fails, sometimes uttered in exasperation. ‘In seeking a way out of the difficulties that beset Europe today people will eventually turn to angels and merakels.’ Max Ross

gauvignon n. /ˈɡəʊvɪnjɒ̃/ The bitter flavour of rejection by one’s subjects, mitigated by a surprising rise in status thereafter. ‘He tasted the perverse gauvignon of unpopularity — for his superiors, it was useful to have a whipping-boy.’ [Taking the Michael, Andrew Marr]. ‘Her tongue was awash with gauvignon; she would recover – but when?’ [Justice in Summer, Nadine Golightly].

trumpolining n. and adj. /ˈtrʌmpəliːnɪŋ / 1. The act of grabbing headlines in a self-serving way and over more deserving cases. ‘It was a clear case of trumpolining: not only would he bring back hanging, he would auction the office of executioner.’ [Presidential Wit, Arianna Huffington]. 2. A tendency to cause self-aggrandising headlines, without regard for sense or consequence; referring to this tendency. ‘“Poverty would be abolished,” said the demagogue, adding, in trumpolining style, that he would export the poor to countries with a better knowledge of their predicament.’ [After the Wall, A.L. Blair]. Bill Greenwell

corbynara n. piquant red sauce used to enliven pasta and party dishes e.g. sorprese alla corbynara Philip Machin

Pestonomics n. etymology from pesto, garishly bright Italian sauce. Economics revitalised by charismatic television personality to disguise dull or unappetising fare. Often served up with wildly disordered hair (Capelli Disordinati). Derivatives: Prestonomics. n. Speeded up Pestonomics, and Plastonomics. n. Pestonomics with explanatory hand gestures. P.C. Parrish

Your next challenge is to submit a reply from Andrew Marvell’s coy mistress (16 lines maximum). Please email entries, wherever possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 23 September.