Bird watching

Rio (3D) is a perfectly average kiddies’ flick, although, as it’s Easter and the kiddies are off school, anything that might amuse them and get them out of your hair should not, I suppose, be sniffed at, and this should do the trick; this is something you can park them at on the days you can’t dump them at grandma’s (grandmas love looking after their grandchildren.

Rio (3D) is a perfectly average kiddies’ flick, although, as it’s Easter and the kiddies are off school, anything that might amuse them and get them out of your hair should not, I suppose, be sniffed at, and this should do the trick; this is something you can park them at on the days you can’t dump them at grandma’s (grandmas love looking after their grandchildren. They may protest: ‘But I’ve got bridge!’ Or: ‘I’m getting my hair done!’ But, if you are quick, you’ll have sped away by then, anyhow). However, if grandma has moved without leaving a forwarding address, as grandmas sometimes do, because they can be quite selfish, this will, at least, buy you 90 minutes of peace.

It’s colourful. The animation seems sufficiently animated. Kids will like it. But it’s not original in any way, has a narrative that’s purely functional — goodies; baddies; baddies chasing goodies — and then there’s the wretched 3D business. Hate it, hate it, hate it. Hate the stupid, uncomfortable glasses. Hate the eye strain. And it adds nothing. We can see 2D as if it were 3D, anyhow. Our brain makes the conversion. It’s what brains do. 3D is to movies what, say, ‘detox diets’ are to health. You don’t need to detox. It’s what livers do. Brains and livers.