Open secrets

Any parent would want to see a school before sending their child there, says Hilaire Gomer – but not everyone makes the most of their visits

 Prospective parents have to visit the schools to which they’re interested in sending their offspring. Now this is fine if it’s just one or two and they’re not too far away, but more is a chore. A tip is to kick off with school web sites: you won’t need a satnav.

When it comes to open days, there are three types of prospective parents. The first group are those who know the school already, having gone there themselves 25 years earlier. These go round quickly, exclaiming about how much nicer the changing rooms are these days. (Though one yummy mummy I spoke to claimed déjà-vu as her excuse for not trooping round Eton, on the grounds that her spouse and her three brothers had all been there.)

Most of the open day crowd belongs to the second group: novices who are well dressed and very thorough, asking every conceivable question. Finally, there is a small group who behave as if they are visiting a show home. There was the case of the man who came to three open-day luncheons at the same school without ever registering his daughter. Usually this group want to see what’s on offer, then they visit comprehensives, to compare and contrast.

One mum said she had ‘done’ ten schools and reported of her most recent open day: ‘It was civilised. A group of us had coffee with the head, who sounded positive about academia, and then a Year 8 took over who continued the reassurance thanks to complete confidence, speaking the King’s English without a stammer, and looking tidy.’