Q. Can you please advise. If you have been invited to meet someone at a club or a restaurant for a meeting or get-together, and you arrive before them (either because you are early or they are late for some reason), is it polite to accept the offer of a drink from the staff and make yourself comfortable? Or is it better manners to wait until your host arrives but then risk the embarrassment of their discomfort which has been added to by your own fastidious manners and patience? Assuming they are going to pick up the tab (it was definitely their invitation) one wouldn’t order a glass of champagne, but on the other hand one doesn’t want to sit there with a glass of water and the air of a nervous interviewee either. What would you recommend?
P.R., London W11
A. There should be no need to order anything. A waiter will understand why you would want to co-ordinate your first rush of well-being to chime with your host’s. There is no need to make the latter feel guilty either. If when he or she finally arrives they affect distress that you have not already begun the refreshment procedure, simply express this sentiment again. This will promote better bonding and thereby increase their comfort rather than discomfort.
Q. I am a 58-year-old widower and well off. Having done the rounds of dinner parties for the past two years (as one of the few eligible men of a certain age in the county), I am socially worn out. And still on my own. I know a couple of male friends who have enrolled on dating agency sites but I am not the internet type. I hardly ever check my emails, let alone, excuse the pun, femails. If only there was a modern-day Mrs Bennet who could introduce me to somebody I haven’t met before. Can you advise?
Name and address withheld
A. You can clearly afford the luxury of a bespoke introducer, so why not employ such a third party? They will interview at length, scrutinise and effectively screen a likely match for you, thus seeing off time-wasters and the criminal classes. Think of them as a headhunter who, instead of searching for the head honcho of UK plc, will aim a carefully targeted bow and arrow at a candidate who, theoretically at least, should be compatible with you. Carpe Diem Personal Introductions will cost around £3,000 but for that you will carry on meeting people until harmony has been achieved. Call the personable owner, Sarah, on 020 8313 0918, for more details.
Q. Our dearest friends have become food fascists and, for carbon footprint reasons, are determined to eat only local or British food. When we go to them they always go on about the latest scrumptious local sausages, cheeses, etc. I am determined to fill our larder with yummy produce whenever they come to us but being a working girl I haven’t time to go to the farmers’ market or wait in for deliveries. Help?
C.L., London W11
A. There is a useful website www.lovebritishfood.co.uk where, in the Want to Buy British section, you can conduct a quick and simple search by supermarket and product for British ‘born’ foodstuffs at an outlet near you. Prime yourself on this website before shopping and this will speed up your progress through the aisles. Incidentally we are in the middle of British Food Fortnight so foodies can look on the website for information on group slavering events.
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