Despite dementia, immobility and incontinence, the old are generally happier than the young

Apart from the weather, which has been so relentlessly horrible that it now deservedly takes precedence in the headlines over even our desperate economic plight, this is turning out to be rather an encouraging time for the old. I do not underestimate how badly the freezing weather affects us. My Jack Russell, Polly, won’t even go outside to do her business in the morning but relieves herself on the carpet in my study instead.  And I am finding it impossible to shake off a bronchial cough that keeps me awake at night and leaves me dispirited by day.

Easter is upon us, a time of renewal and rebirth, of daffodils and baby rabbits, but what do we get? Just bewildered hedgehogs emerging from hibernation joyfully to greet the spring only to find themselves wandering about in an arctic wasteland. If Easter Day turns out to be as grim as I anticipate, you might find it cheering to turn on the television when it is midday in Rome to see Pope Francis emerge on to the balcony of St Peter’s to deliver his Easter message to the city and the world. For during the five years when I worked as a correspondent in Rome, never once did the sun fail to come out at precisely that moment. It almost made me believe in miracles.

But as I was saying, this is nevertheless a good time for the old. First of all, thanks largely to a recent article in the Daily Telegraph by the editor of The Spectator, there is belated recognition that an ageing population is not so much a burden on society as something to be proud of. As Fraser Nelson wrote, ‘To be a “young” country is no boast: it tends to mean poverty, sickness and low life expectancy. But the converse is also true: as a country becomes more prosperous, its people become healthier and live longer.’ And Nelson went on to point out that, despite the fact that more and more of us will live longer and longer until half the children born now are likely to live beyond 100, ‘the over-65s are not just fitter than ever, but working harder than ever and paying more tax than ever’.

This doesn’t mean that an awful lot of us won’t need a great deal of looking after and that, according to a House of Lords report, Britain is ‘woefully unprepared’ for this. But despite this gloomy prospect, and the threats of dementia, immobility and incontinence that hang over us all, there is the surprising discovery that the old are generally happier than the young. According to a survey by the Office for National Statistics (ONS), old people are happier because they value their friends more and tend to feel more part of their community. Maybe friendship is an unfamiliar concept to the young, for the ONS felt obliged to explain what it meant. ‘Friends,’ it said, ‘are part of a person’s support system and, unlike family, are chosen by the individual. They may often give advice on decisions and are companions in life who share interests and can be confided in.’

To most people that would appear obvious, but it’s perhaps true that by the end of a long life people generally stop trying out new friends and fishing around for better ones but settle for the few they have known for a long time and feel they can rely on. This may well make them feel more comfortable and secure. As for a sense of belonging to a community, it seems natural that this should grow stronger in old age when people are less fussed and distracted and more likely to stay in one place. This, too, is a comfort, but one that younger people, busy competing with each other and trying to get ahead, often want to resist.

One might imagine that growing decrepitude and the fear of death would outweigh the solace that old people find in such companionship, but fortunately this doesn’t seem to be so. I never cease to be impressed by the way people go on looking to the future until the very end of their lives. But, oh, the weather!