Q. Last week I had dinner with some old friends in London. My husband was unable to join us since he was working late but came to pick me up at the end of the evening. When he arrived everyone had finished eating but we were all still sitting at the table. When a man walks into a room with ten people sitting at a table, one of whom is his wife and the other nine of whom he knows well, to whom should he correctly ‘go’ first? Opinion seems to be divided as to whether he should go first to his wife (who is quite cross with him for working late), or to one of his hosts.
A.E., Wilts
A. He correctly goes first to his hostess then takes in his wife en route to his host. From the host he can then make a step-wise progression around the women at the table, alternating cheek-bashing for women with back-slapping for men. A word of warning — it is tempting for those sitting at a table to jump to their feet to show enthusiasm for the late arrival. This is an impulse best resisted since such jack-in-the-boxing is unlikely to be uniform and will add to the late arrival’s mental confusion regarding the precedence of greeting.
Q. During the shooting season our neighbour in the Old Rectory, who is too busy to pluck the game he shoots, struck a ‘pluck three, keep two’ deal with me. This suited everyone but the problem was that he was often equally too busy to drop the birds off at my cottage and would only alert me if he happened to run into me, by which time the birds were too high. How can I improve things next season?
Name and address withheld
A. Suggest to your neighbour an arrangement whereby he leaves what game he might be considering putting your way hanging in a set place outside his rectory.
Comments
Join the debate for just $5 for 3 months
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for $5.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just $5 for 3 monthsAlready a subscriber? Log in