After Glastonbury was certified as a leftie, middle-class Labour lovefest, best spent listening to the musical legend that is Jeremy Corbyn, where Channel 4 presenters chant: 'f--- the Tories', it seems safe spaces for music-loving Conservatives are in short supply.
So, where ought a Tory find their festival fix? As Labour politicians – including Tom Watson, Louise Haigh, and of course, Ed Balls – takeover Somerset, Mr S hears that Ed Vaizey has managed to find a safe haven for Conservatives closer to home. According to the latest register of interests, the former minister recently enjoyed a trip to the Capital FM Summertime Ball in London, receiving four hospitality tickets worth £1,000.
Given that the last time a Tory MP went to Summertime Ball they came back with a black-eye, Mr S hopes that Vaizey had a less bruising experience than Whitto the year before.