Rod Liddle

Euros 2021: England are easily the most boring side in the tournament

Euros 2021: England are easily the most boring side in the tournament
(Photo: Getty)
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England 0 Scotland 0

Hungary 1 (Fiola) France 1 (Griezmann)

The wonderful Hungarians almost took my mind off England’s lamentable performance last night and the usual stupid, self-serving, excuses from Southgate. England are easily the most boring side in this tournament. It is remarkable how Southgate has sucked the life out of such talented players over the last two or three years. Maybe we should hand out MBEs for any England player who can score. Scotland fought well and won every fifty-fifty ball – but then England consider themselves above fifty-fifty balls. Matt Hancock would be a better England manager than Mr Waistcoat. The team has taken on his mantle of boredom, of passing backwards at every opportunity, of being risk averse, or stifling creativity, of being glacially slow.

But the Hungarians were terrific again and this time got themselves a deserved point against the world champions. They had led for 20 minutes or so, spurred on by a vast and magnificently partisan crowd. I will come to France’s forward line in a moment – but it does strike me that they have a jittery and tardy defence. Some team will exploit it in this tournament, but not England.

The forwards are an hilarious bunch. Mbappe hates Giroud, who thinks he is poorly served in terms of passes from the youngster. Benzema also hates Giroud, who he compared to a ‘go-kart’. Benzema – a truly horrible scrote – has a busy few months ahead of him: he is up in court in October for allegedly blackmailing a fellow professional over some sordid sex issue. Of Algerian heritage, he refuses to sing the French national anthem and liked a post calling for Allah to unleash punishment on those who encroached on the honour of Mohammed, after Emmanuel Macron stated his support for Samuel Paty, the poor teacher beheaded by a Jihadi.

Hopefully the mutual loathing between various members of the French team will hamper their progress. Hungary now need to beat Germany.

Man of the Match – Kleinheisler (Hungary).

Reasons for bumptious Scots to shut up for a minute – you’re almost certainly out, anyway.