In the pub, awaiting developments

I’m not quite on the BBC election panel – I’ve had better luck. I’m down the boozer: the St Stephens Tavern with Emily Maitlis and a wide array of pundits. They’ll come to us every now and again as we give our considered opinion on how there are no meaningful results expected until about 3am. Michael Portillo and LibDem Mark Oaten being made up now (you’d be amazed to see how long it takes to apply foundation to Oaten’s slaphead). Something tells me it’s going to be a long night.