Inhuman resources: when did job-hunting become such an ordeal?

A two-line email popped into my inbox: ‘I regret to inform you that your application for the post of communications officer has not been successful on this occasion.’

Two decades as a national journalist, plus experience as a ministerial and corporate press adviser, and yet again, I’d failed even to secure an interview — this time to be a part-time communications officer in a college.

If you have not applied for work in the past few years, ‘human resources’ — or HR as it is known — may be unfamiliar. But it has stealthily turned job-hunting into an ordeal, and my experience is far from un-usual. Forget simply sending off your CV to secure a vacant position. Forget your track record speaking for itself. Forget the bleeding obvious.

In the world of HR, CVs are ignored and applications are scanned for bias. Job-hunters are warned that just because their CV shows they have, say, a research degree, it will not go to show they are capable of research. Nor does a long career in journalism suggest the ability to communicate. Instead, skills must be stated clearly and in very specific HR jargon.

When a position becomes vacant, no matter how humble the role, HR will draw up a list of some 20-30 responsibilities along with essential criteria. In their applications candidates need to demonstrate, with examples, that they have achieved everything on this list. An English graduate may need to explain that they have the ability to ‘read and interpret written documents’. A long-standing financial professional could be required to give examples of dealing ‘effectively’ with financial issues. Effective (as opposed to useless) is a favoured word in HR circles, along with energetic (a code word for ‘young’), excellent (again, young), impact (young) and challenge (young).