Irresponisble behaviour

The other day I arrived back from a trip abroad to find the house in its usual state of working order. The boiler had burst and there was no hot water. Katalin, the Hungarian housekeeper, claimed she had contracted frostbite in her big toe and was hopping around like a one-legged woman, complaining about the uncivilised London weather.

But, I protested, in Budapest the temperature was at least ten degrees lower than that in southern England. Yes, she replied, but in Hungary even the cleaning ladies wore fur to keep them warm. This conjured up ideas of mink toe-warmers and goodness knows what else. In lieu of my possessing any of these exotic accoutrements, I suggested we have some wine.

Thus we were both drinking Pino Grigio in the sitting-room, Katalin with her toe in the air, when this idyll was interrupted by a series of loud noises. One of the neighbours was having a party. They had turned the decibels up on the music system and then began to let off fireworks. Halfway into our bottle of wine, we were only mildly irritated by this, but something odd began to happen to Mimi, the Wyatt family hound.

First the thing began to shake. Then it let out a great howl of displeasure. This was followed by more shaking and then by a series of horrible choking sounds. I had heard somewhere that dogs dislike loud noises and expected she would calm down. But the choking became worse. I ran for a book I have on first aid for dogs. I have to say that this book turned out to be singularly unhelpful. There was nothing in the index about fireworks. Eventually, I found a section on panic attacks.