Jeremy Clarke Jeremy Clarke

Low life | 28 May 2011

Jeremy Clarke reports on his Low life

issue 28 May 2011

After the Cow Girl debacle, I went straight back online with another dating site. I was working on the same principle as those eager to get behind the wheel again as soon as possible after a serious accident to regain confidence.

I signed on with a dating site designed for people wanting to have sex with as many people as possible and posted a photograph of myself with no clothes on, just my glasses, and smiling confidently and a little suavely at the camera, as though clothed or unclothed it was all the same to Lord Tangent, as I called myself. I also indicated, by ticking boxes beside diagrams of little stick people making love in various positions, the positions I preferred. Three of the ten I hadn’t considered before and one looked well beyond my capacity, but I ticked all of them. I also ticked yes to ten questions about my sexual habits, likes and dislikes, including one asking whether I ‘like it if it hurts a bit’.

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