It is that time of year when people in churches across the land have to face the difficult question of how to read scripture out loud. I count myself a bit of an expert in this, not because I have had to do it many times for some 35 years, but because I have seen everything go wrong that can go wrong.
It is like the fear that engulfs me when-ever an unaccompanied treble kicks off the first verse of ‘Once in Royal David’s City’ at the service’s start. If the treble goes off-key in that solo verse, one of the great black holes in the universe opens up – for the choir and conductor must swiftly decide whether they should begin their next unaccompanied verse in the original key, or resign themselves to whatever key the treble has arrived at.
Many years ago I was a witness to one of the worst things ever to happen at a service of Nine Lessons and Carols. Through an attack of nerves, the solo treble sang the wrong interval on both the second and third notes of his solo. The other trebles looked curious at this new state of affairs. The back rows of the choir looked panic-stricken. The eyes of the choirmaster flared like those of a driver who has just seen a freight lorry pull out in front of him.
Everyone tried to think on their feet. But they were different feet. During those long seconds no consensus could be arrived at. And so it came to pass that when the choir started the second verse, they did so on an almost precise 50-50 split.
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