The journalist and author Mary Killen is in the limelight this week. In addition to writing the Dear Mary column in the Spectator every week, she has written a self-help book about the loving Queen. How the Queen Can Make You Happy will be published on 1 June.
1) As a child, what did you read under the covers?
The William stories by Richmal Crompton and the The Passion Flower Hotel, which turned out to be secretly written not by a schoolgirl but by Roger Longrigg the father of Fan Longrigg, the singer and producer of The Land of Sometimes a charming 2012 CD to inspire musical participation in children, Sir Robert Mayer-style. .
2) Has a book ever made you cry, and if so which one?
The Pursuit of Love, by Nancy Mitford, when the Linda character cannot read the longed-for wartime letter from her true love, Fabrice because his handwriting is too luxuriant.
3) You are about to be put into solitary confinement for a year and allowed to take three books. What would you choose?
The Life of Doctor Johnson by James
Boswell; the honesty of it — also, Boswell just can’t help writing stylish sentences.
The Remembrance of Things
Past by Marcel Proust (or, if that is cheating in size terms, then War and Peace by Tolstoy).
The Life Application Study
Bible, (New International Version). It’s so clarifying. Footnotes explain baffling things like why anyone would even dream of having burning coals heaped on their head.
4) Which literary character would you most like to sleep with?
Dr Finlay of Dr Finlay’s Casebook. Growing up in Northern Ireland with bombs exploding roundabout means that, above all, I want reassurance. Sorry, did they mean sleep or sex? If it was just sex, then, obviously, Tarzan.
5) If you could write a self-help book, what would you call it?
Well, I have just written How the Queen Can Make you Happy. Having done it for a bit, I also believe that traditional yoga can make a dramatic impact on your well-being and usefulness to others but , as I am too lazy to do it each day, my self-help book would be called, ‘How to raise enough money to get someone to come into your house and bully you to do yoga each day until you have evolved enough not to need them.’
6) Michael Gove has asked you to rewrite the GCSE English Literature syllabus. Which book, which play, and which poem would you make compulsory reading?
The Browning Version (unless it is already on the syllabus)
Deadly Sins by Nicholas Coleridge, unless that is too long. Coleridge’s book is a brilliantly observed social satire. It is hilarious and has plenty of characters for children to identify with or hate.
On Giving by Kahil Gibran (poem)
7) Which party from literature would you most like to have attended?
The Fete Etrange in Le Grand Meaulnes so I could have intervened and stopped Meaulnes from wasting time being asleep.
8) What would you title your memoirs?
‘From the Bog to Belgravia’ — this title was often suggested to me by the late Michael Alexander ‘leader of the Chelsea Set’ who lived in Eaton Place, Belgravia himself. He always chuckled as he proposed it, while chain smoking. Personally I rarely went near bogs, since I grew up in a provincial town in Northern Ireland, but I agree that the title has a ring to it.
9) Which literary character do you dream of playing?
Snow White — I like the idea of being paid to be asleep
10) What book would you give to a lover?
I cannot advise, although it is said that My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday promotes lust — if that is the sort of thing you want.
11) Spying Mein Kampf or Dan Brown on someone’s bookshelf can spell havoc for a friendship. What’s your literary dealbreaker?
The Joy of Sex by Alex Comfort
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