What words <em>really</em> mean

I met a very interesting chap while doing my weekly video film for the Sunday Times. This was Dr Peter Mullen, Rector of St Michael, Cornhill. He hove into view like a disreputable clergyman from a lateish Graham Greene story, dog collar, strange hat, impish grin. He has just written a book — The Politically Incorrect Lexicon — which is very funny; intemperate, intolerant, astute and great fun. There’s a forword to it by Quentin Letts, but you can skip that.

Here are some of my favourite definitions from the book:

Islamophobia: Unreasonable dislike of suicide bombers.

Vulnerable to Eating Disorders: Greedy, self-obsessed.

Classic: Any pop song more than five years old.

Banana: Fruit used to demonstrate to junior school children how to put on a condom.

Inclusivity: Equal access for Oiks. The abolition of all rational evaluative criteria for admission. See University.

Poetry: Any lines of words which don’t quite reach the margins.

Love Child: Accidental bastard.

Minorities: Politically preferred sub groups of undesirables.