When your wife kidnaps your child

Griffin Stone shows how British justice tramples on the rights of fathers and brutally deprives them of access to their offspring

I am a member of a club I never wanted to join. I barely knew the club existed until I had become a member. I would love to pull out altogether, but the decision, unfortunately, isn’t mine.

I see my fellow members as a breed of noble losers, though my self-image doesn’t permit me to see myself that way. They are men – yes, it is an overwhelmingly male club, though women have been known to gain entry – who have lost court battles (usually many), personal struggles, money, time, professional standing and peace of mind, yet still fight on because they believe they are right, because they can’t give up, they won’t let go. I would say many of them are obsessive. I don’t blame them.

We are parents who have been cut off from our children. The degree of estrangement varies greatly, from some fathers who haven’t seen their children for years, to others who are seeing them a few times a year, or monthly, but under controlled and often demeaning circumstances. These are not child-abusers, sexual deviants, drug addicts or alcoholics, though many have been accused of being one or more of the above. Members of this club are, overwhelmingly, good men who have had children with women who probably would like to see their ex-partners drop off the face of the earth, and then close or unreasonably restrict access to their children.

All over Britain, children are being deprived of contact with one of the two most important people in their lives – their fathers. Few realise how widespread this phenomenon is: according to Families Need Fathers, between 40 and 50 per cent of men lose contact with their children within two years of a separation.