On Tuesday night I was body double/understudy for the brave, brainy, beautiful Rachel Riley, at a packed ‘support Israel’ evening. The keynote speaker was the brave, brainy, beautiful lawyer Natasha Hausdorff. I was slightly out of my depth but I hope I provided some light relief. Natasha was dazzling in defence of beleaguered democracy, but the facts are sombre and the audience went home a little more concerned about our future in the diaspora. Anti-Semitism is known to be a light sleeper. I fear it may become insomniac.
I’ve been arguing vehemently with my brother Geoff about everything and nothing for 75 years. Inevitably, these days, our arguments are about Israel. I went with my chap David to stay with Geoff for three days in Belgium and I think David was somewhat shocked by the sight of the two of us fighting. First night:
Geoff (reasonable, provocative): It’s simple. They should just assassinate Hamas leaders.
Me: Oh, easy! Picking off terrorist thugs in luxury hotels in Qatar and underground tunnels the size of London Underground?
Geoff: If anyone can do it, it’s Mossad.
Me (livid): All solved then. You call Netanyahu and tell him you’ve designed a ‘long-range murder app that goes around corners’.
The next day we made up in the gilded Grand-Place over Belgian fries and beer. Then a visit to the Waterloo battlefield, which only confirms the absurdity of war. I’d never realised that the killing fields of this ‘operation’ were three Flemish farms. Thousands of volunteers provided their own uniforms, boots and weapons, 27 per cent of whom were Jewish boys trying to prove their allegiance to their country.
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