Society

Dream date

In Competition No. 2513 you were invited to submit a Spectator Love Bug ad for a well-known literary character. I was hoping for such comic gems as grace the compellingly quirky lonely-hearts column in the London Review of Books: ‘Eager-to-please woman, 36, seeks domineering man to take advantage of her flagging confidence. Tell me I’m pretty and watch me cling’. This potentially suicidal self-deprecation produces ads that are both hilarious and touching — and apparently successful from time to time. What woman could fail to be won over by Quasimodo’s honesty, courtesy of John Plowman: ‘You say personality matters more than looks? Well, I’m your man. Brought up in an

Fraser Nelson

‘Now we have got to have something to say’

A new map hangs in George Osborne’s office, showing the latest parliamentary boundaries for the next general election. It could have been designed to soothe the nerves of a Conservative party election co-ordinator, for it is dominated by Tory blue. A few tricks have been used to achieve this optical illusion. There is no Scotland, for example, and marginal Labour seats are painted a faint red. But overall the picture is of a Conservative country, and an election which is eminently winnable. This is how Mr Osborne sees it — and not, he insists, just to keep morale up. ‘Although I never said so at the time, I went into

Farewell to a noble figure in Spectator history

Ian Gilmour was not the only proprietor of The Spectator also to be its editor, but he was unquestionably the best. Patrician, wealthy, high-minded, unassuming, the 28-year-old Etonian ex-Grenadier Guardsman raised a number of eyebrows when he bought the magazine in 1954 and took over the editorial reins himself. However, the five years of his editorship were to cause a lot more surprise when, in fostering The Spectator’s libertarian tradition, he not only espoused radical causes but frequently opposed the Eden and Macmillan governments. In some important respects The Spectator under Gilmour’s direction anticipated the free-thinking mood of the 1960s. He was a junior barrister, in Lord Hailsham’s chambers, and

James Forsyth

Welcome to the liveliest of coffee houses — online

A warm invitation to The Spectator’s new website The Spectator has a new website — redesigned, easier to use, with new features and writers. The online magazine will continue to do what the print magazine has always done on paper: inspire debate, stir up controversy and have some fun, with the added advantage that you can add your thoughts to ours. In expanding our web presence we are being true to the traditions of the magazine. The original Spectator of Joseph Addison and Richard Steele arose from the free-wheeling intellectual sparring of the 18th-century coffee house, and if there’s a modern version of this — a space where people can

A choice of recent audiobooks

How do you like a book to be read? There is the way my wife reads to me with her normal, unaccented voice throughout, just as she reads to me from the newspaper, say, letting the words on the page establish in my brain what the author intended — or so we hope. At the other extreme there is the fully acted and dramatised reading with old voices, foreign accents, all speaking angrily, casually, suspiciously, humorously etc. I hate this sort of reading. I feel irritated and patronised, as if the reader is saying, ‘Obviously you and the author can’t get it together on your own but don’t worry, I

Last rites

Even before the last splurge of qualifying group games are played in rugby union’s World Cup, consensus agrees the tournament has already turned into a calamity for the four from the British Isles. Even before the last splurge of qualifying group games are played in rugby union’s World Cup, consensus agrees the tournament has already turned into a calamity for the four from the British Isles. Even a quarter-final place will mean a grievous sudden-death public execution next weekend. We shall see. Mind you, say the silver-lining bright-siders, the rugby in France has at least been a jolly sight heartier for domestic spirits than that of England’s cricketers in South

Alex Massie

In search of a Golden Age…

When I saw that The Atlantic had a feature on “The Greatest Sports Book Ever Written” in its October edition I thought, well, that’s nice but I daresay they really mean “The Greatest Sports Book Ever Written That Isn’t About Cricket.” Be wary of your assumptions. turns out I underestimated the Atlantic’s taste and perspicacity. For, lo, there it is: a fine piece by Joseph O’Neill explaining why CLR James’ Beyond A Boundary is an important work – though a mystifying one should you have no knowledge of the greatest game of them all. O’Neill concludes that it’s sad that Beyond A Boundary is off-limits to Americans. But I’m not

You’ll be laughing presently

Present Laughter opens at the National Theatre next week and I went to a preview last night. Theatre-goers are in for a treat. Alex Jennings is a terrific Garry Essendine (a part Noël Coward himself played), and the set by Tim Hatley is wonderfully evocative of a Thirties drawing room. Altogether a hugely warm-hearted, witty production.

A dazzling evening

Just come home from Theo Fennell’s exhibition “Show Off” at The Royal Academy of Arts – one of the glitziest and most impressive parties I’ve been to this year. Theo has brilliantly elevated and showcased his jewellery designs to a new level. This is an “experience” not to be missed.  By devising a series of extraordinary installations of great beauty, innovation and humour he forces the viewer to look at his jewels as a serious art form. This puts Damien Hirst’s diamond-encrusted skull in the shade. This is beauty and the bling. Craft and creativity. Don’t miss it.    

Alex Massie

Department of Reaping What You Sow

I hadn’t paid any attention to the women’s World Cup until the US manager Greg Ryan decided it was a sensible notion to switch goalkeepers before yesterday’s semi-final against Brazil, dropping first choice Hope Solo (great name!) and recalling the 36 year old Briana Scurry. Off-hand I can’t think of any comparable goalie switch. When Alex Ferguson famously dropped Jim Leighton and promoted Les Sealey for an FA Cup final replay his decision was at least based on what her perceived as Leighton’s loss of confidence. But Ryan had no such excuse since no-one, not even the manager, pretended that Solo had done anything wrong. Instead what seems to have

One of the best places in London to hear music

I spent last night in one of my favourite places in the whole of London: Wilton’s Music Hall. Anyone who hasn’t yet been to the magical, near-derelict building which is hidden down Graces Alley near the Tower of London: go. A treat is in store for you. The place where the Can-Can was premiered—and promptly banned—it is the oldest surviving music hall in the world and is also included, sadly, in the world’s 100 most endangered buildings. Stepping from the blustery September wind into its warm, crumbling interior last night I was reminded of the wonderful sense of history that envelops you there: the faded gilt and mahogany holding the

Now for something truly horrible

They say that things will be better between Britain and American — or at any rate between No 10 and the White House — when Hillary Clinton becomes president. How depressing is that? For an answer, check out these clips of the Laughing Hillary from Jon Stewart’s team at the Daily Show. The woman has been so thoroughly groomed for television that she is now scarcely human. Her laugh must be the most grisly product on the face of the earth. It’s so horrid it’s hilarious.   Yet this is the person most likely to be the next President of the United States. What’s wrong with America? There are no

BT need to be more broad minded

Success – of a sort. I first contacted Virgin Media seven weeks ago as I wanted to change from dial-up to broadband. Yesterday (after some five weeks of almost daily nagging) I was sent a text message that my ‘Virgin broadband service is now active’. Why the delay? Virgin blamed BT, and BT wouldn’t speak to me as I was not a retail customer. During the five-week impasse, I asked BT – retail sales division — how long it would take to set up its broadband on my (BT) telephone line. Five working days, I was told. If BT can fix broadband for its own customers so quickly, why not

Have the Angry Young Men won out?

Proofs of The Letters of Noel Coward and a new book about the Royal Court Theatre arrived at The Spectator together and their conjunction made me wonder, who is winning? In 1956 Look Back in Anger arrived in Sloane Square and is supposed to have blasted the genteel primness from the London stage forever. A motley group were roped together as Angry Young Men (Iris Murdoch? Angus Wilson?) and stood for the future. Naturally this could not quite be true overnight but the new playwrights flourished and multiplied, new actors with new accents became stars, the plays transferred to the West End and Broadway. Soon the Royal Court directors made

The McCanns go through hell again

The longing for the girl snapped in Morocco to be Madeleine McCann rippled round the world. This story has taken so many twists and turns, many of them savage, but it has always been underpinned by a hope, however remote, that the child may still be alive. So it is heart-breaking to learn that the pictured girl is, in fact, a blonde Berber called Bouchra Benaissa. One can only imagine the new misery suffered by the McCanns themselves as yet another dawn proved to be false. They must wonder each morning how many varieties of Hell are left for them to be put through. I was reminded of a passage

Alex Massie

A Facebook Agony Uncle Emerges…

What’s the appropriate way to deal with a “Will you be my Facebook Friend?” request from someone you don’t know? How many damn friends should you have anyway? The estimable Reihan Salam tells you what you need to know about these and other social networking dilemmas..

Alex Massie

Fat Bastard Actually Accurate Characterisation of the Modern Scot

Oh great. Who knows, perhaps this is even true. I blame Glaswegians. Obesity levels in Scotland are the second highest in the developed world behind the USA, new statistics have revealed. The figures were published as the Scottish Government announced plans to  remove sweets and fizzy drinks from schools. Under new rules, the amount of chips served in school meals will also be cut and more fruit and vegetables provided. Children’s Minister Adam Ingram said he wanted to change young people’s habits. The figures , released by ISD Scotland, the statistical wing of the NHS, said the “obesity epidemic” in Scotland must be addressed and outlines the extent of the