The Battle for Britain – 13 June 2019
Society
Thursday
to 2409: Crosswords
The unclued lights are all hybrid animals whose names are formed by combining the names of the two original animals. First prize Miriam Moran, Pangbourne, Berkshire Runners-up David Carpenter, Sutton Coldfield; Dr R.J. Bell, Hampton Hill, Middlesex
Greener than thou
Even before the government this week announced a legally binding target to cut greenhouse gas emissions to net zero by 2050, the Tory leadership contenders were competing fiercely to establish their green credentials. Andrea Leadsom has vowed to declare a ‘climate emergency’. Rory Stewart has upgraded it to a ‘climate cataclysm’ and wants to double the amount of foreign aid spent on climate change. Sajid Javid says he would treat fighting climate change like fighting terrorism. Even Boris Johnson, who once called wind turbines a ‘hideous Venusian invasion’, has leapt on the 100 per cent carbon-free bandwagon, marvelling earlier this week about wind farms and solar panels. While the leadership
Victories for Rafa, Rory and rain
Hardly any men can hit a tennis ball on clay better than Dominic Thiem. Unfortunately he ran into one who could in the French Open final last Sunday. It is worth reflecting on the extraordinary scale of Rafael Nadal’s achievement, besides his ability to rock a very stylish yellow T-shirt. This was his 12th win in 15 attempts at Roland Garros and one of his three ‘failures’ was a withdrawal in 2016 with a wrist injury. That’s two defeats in 15 years on the most punishing grand slam surface. Has there ever been a blend of athlete and venue to rival it? Rafa’s savage spin on the forehand has always
Church visitors’ books
I am memorialised twice in my village church. Not in some premature lapidary way, but in the visitors’ book. The first time was with my toddler, when I wrote her name down. Some years later I showed her that scribbled evidence and inked us in again. There we were, here we are. I always sign these modest manuscripts, with their columns for date, name, address and comments, and I’m always touched by the commonplaces: ‘So peaceful.’ ‘Thank you for being open.’ ‘Beautiful.’ Sometimes the signatories are far from home; tourists who stumble in, or those searching out forebears. On a recent trip to Ludlow, in pursuit of A. E. Housman,
Wine Club 15 June
We were quite the merry band. Forty or so Spectator readers — many of them veterans of our fabled Spectator Winemaker Lunches and graduates of our equally celebrated Spectator Wine School — joined me for a bespoke wine tasting at Majestic’s St. John’s Wood store last week. One impressively hardy soul polished his drinking boots especially well and joined us for the Seresin Estate Winemaker Lunch the following day too. Excellent work! We tasted almost 50 wines, all Spanish, and our six favourites are herewith offered to fellow readers at generously discounted prices. All wines were tasted blind. That’s to say the bottles were completely covered to obscure any hint
It would be weird if Gove hadn’t taken drugs
Cocaine is an abominable drug, by far the most hateful of all the various uppers and downers and psychoactives because it turns you into such a complete moron. The problem with coke, as my friend, the drug historian Mike Jay, once explained to me, is that nature never intended us to use it the way we do. In its raw, coca leaf form, it’s a handy and pleasant stimulant, just what you need to keep you going on a long trek over the Andes. But in its refined form it’s just nasty, not least because it plays a cruel, built-in trick on you. You take cocaine to get high —
A rotten party
New York For leftist anti-Trumpers like me, the Mueller report was initially a godsend, though not for the more obvious reasons. I belong to a rarified group that hates liberal moaning about Russian ‘interference’ in the 2016 election: we ridicule the claim that Vladimir Putin and his henchmen stole the presidency from Hillary Clinton because we know that Clinton herself and neo-liberal Clintonism were the real causes of her demise. I often tell outraged Democrats to calm down and stop watching Russiagate obsessives such as Rachel Maddow on TV. Trump, I insist, won the electoral college thanks to 80,000 or so angry former Democrats in three states — many thrown
Daddy issues | 13 June 2019
When I was growing up in the late 1960s, boys like me craved the admiration and approval of our dads; we wanted nothing more than to impress them. And now that we are dads, we crave the admiration and approval of our children; we want nothing more than to impress them. But the curious thing is, they don’t care about impressing us. In fact, our teenage children are just like our dads were — distant figures who are busy getting on with their own lives. Today we demonise dads of the recent past for being cold and uncaring. For failing to change nappies, read stories at bedtime, provide the unconditional
Moral of the Woodford saga: if you want to back start-ups, do it yourself
Hounds are baying for the blood of former star investment manager Neil Woodford, whose shrinking funds have closed for withdrawals. His promoters such as the broker Hargreaves Lansdown have also been taking media flak, as has the Financial Conduct Authority, whose critics say it should have spotted the problem early and intervened. There are suggestions that Woodford and his associates have made ‘a huge pile of money’ (to quote Merryn Somerset Webb in the FT) out of an over-puffed venture in which small investors are now stuck — and that all those responsible should queue up for a public lashing from the Treasury select committee. So it goes: as a
Fan mail
In Competition No. 3102 you were invited to submit a fan letter from one well-known person from the field of fact or fiction to another. Frank McDonald’s Lady Macbeth fist-bumps Nicola Sturgeon: ‘My dearest Nicola there is no need/ For me to pour my spirits in thine ear;/ Already you excel me in your lust/ To seize the Scottish crown…’. Ben Hale imagines Emperor Palpatine high-fiving Jean Claude-Juncker: ‘I wanted to express my admiration from afar (very afar) of your skill at knitting together a number of different systems under one central body politic…’; and Sylvia Fairley’s Mrs Malaprop writes admiringly to Dr Roget: ‘I would like to repress
Wednesday
Books Podcast: does tripping balls tell us anything profound about human consciousness?
This week’s books podcast promises to be a trip. I’m joined by Mike Jay to talk about the history of mescaline — a psychedelic drug whose influence goes from the earliest South American civilisations through the 19th-century Indian Wars up to W B Yeats, Aleister Crowley and (of course) Aldous Huxley and Hunter S Thompson. Does tripping balls tell us anything profound about human consciousness? How come Mexico got all the good drugs? And why did Aldous Huxley lie about his trousers?
Boris-onomics is what Britain needs
A few jokes. A sprinkling of tax cuts. A few more jokes. A couple of flashy new buildings. And then back to the jokes. As Boris Johnson launches his pitch for the premiership – and takes a commanding lead among Tory MPs – it would be easy to dismiss his economic programme, along with the rest of his plans, as flimsy self-promotion, with about as much substance as one of his columns. After all, he is leaning heavily on his record as London mayor to prove his credentials and most of his critics will dismiss that as irrelevant. But hold on. In fact, Johnson’s record as mayor was exceptionally good. And his time
Tuesday
Watch: Lorraine Kelly tears into Esther McVey
ITV breakfast presenter Lorraine Kelly has such a reputation for being friendly and warm on screen, that the TV host managed to win an entire tax case based on the fact that she doesn’t play herself, but a ‘chatty’ version of ‘Lorraine’ in front of the cameras. So plenty of eyebrows were raised this week when Kelly was introduced live on air to the Tory leadership contender Esther McVey, who worked with Kelly on GMTV in the past, and could barely muster a smile for her former colleague. Asked if she remembered McVey, Kelly curtly replied: ‘Yes. Yes I do.’ Before quickly moving the conversation on. this longer version of
Monday
Toby Young is wrong: most people don’t think virtue comes from victimhood
Toby Young claims that ‘being LGBT is now the height of respectability, while being a white “cishet” male is morally suspect.’ Toby, you’re wrong: virtue and respectability are not based on labels, and LGBT people have many more battles ahead. I would like to present Exhibit A: David Attenborough. Why this venerable presenter, you might ask? Well, Toby seems to think that in many parts of the ‘educated bourgeoisie’, virtue is determined by how many victimhood labels you wear. If we were to accept this as true, then it would indeed follow that the bottom rung of the virtue ladder would be filled with men, condemned to eternal suspicion through
The New York Times and the problem with ‘radicalisation’
One of the words that has become increasingly useless over recent years is ‘radicalisation’. As more and more terrorist attacks took place across the West in recent years the word got trotted out with some utility. Al-Qaeda and Isis fighters were reported to have been ‘radicalised’. Soon a whole arm of dubious expertise grew, purporting to be able to trace the various ‘paths’ to radicalisation. But at some point in the present decade the word became used, not just as a term of faux-science, but as a way to dismiss almost any position against which a certain individual or group of individuals were opposed. Voters were said to have been
Why didn’t the experts warn us about the Remain Recession?
The economy would tank. Trade would collapse. Unemployment would soar, and house prices would sink. In the run-up to the referendum, and in the three years of tortured negotiations about leaving since then, we heard lots of dire warnings about what would happen to the economy if we left the EU. And yet we heard very little from the same experts – the Bank of England, the CBI and so on – about what would happen if we didn’t leave at the end of March. And yet it turns out that the British economy has contracted sharply, not because we left the EU, but because we didn’t leave. We are
Spectator competition winners: ‘Please quit all that huddling…’: contemporary takes on ‘The New Colossus’
The latest challenge was an invitation to compose a contemporary take on ‘The New Colossus’, the 1883 sonnet by Emma Lazarus that is inscribed on a bronze plaque on the pedestal of the Statue of Liberty: Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame, With conquering limbs astride from land to land; Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame. ‘Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!’ cries she With silent lips. ‘Give me your tired,
Sunday
It’s easy to sex up the business of paying tax | 9 June 2019
To fund the war against Napoleon in 1813, Princess Marianne of Prussia invented an ingenious tax-raising scheme. Wealthy Prussians were called on to hand their jewellery to the state; in exchange they were given iron replacements for the gold items they had donated. Stamped on the iron replicas were the words ‘Gold gab ich für Eisen’. The phrase has a double meaning, the iron referring to the iron of the replica, but also to the ‘iron’ your donation had bought as armaments. At Prussian balls thereafter, iron jewellery carried more status than gold. Gold merely proved your family was rich; iron proved you were not only rich but patriotic. Why
Saturday
Budweiser flags up how Pride has been taken over by corporations
Maurice Bowra, the flamboyant warden of Wadham College from 1938 to 1970, once argued against the legalisation of homosexuality on the grounds that it would take all the fun out of it. Without the risk of being picked up by the police, cruising up and down the Cowley Road at one in the morning would become rather tedious. He referred to the secret club of powerful homosexuals in the British establishment as the ‘homintern’ and prided himself on being a high-ranking officer. He liked the fact that there was something exotic and clandestine about his sexuality and dreaded the risk of embourgeoisement if the law was changed. Easy for Bowra
