Marathon
‘News from Marathon. But first, a look at some of today’s other top stories.’
More cartoons
Thursday
Tiger 2
‘Looks like the tiger came to tea.’
Ethical
‘Relax — it’s ethically sourced.’
Thursday
Tattoo 2
‘Are you sure you want me to carry on with this, Mr Dimbleby?’
Kafka
‘It’s not Kafkaesque, it’s normal.’
Fish 2
‘It’s such a perfect day, I’m glad I spent it with you...’
Instant
‘Instant? Certainly, madam. Take a seat and someone will be with you in a minute.’
Ebay
Panda 2
‘We are very happy with the Chinese-themed room but could you remove the panda, please.’
Blue
‘Could that be from his blue period?’
Cut
‘It’s the director’s cut.’
Houseprices
‘I can’t see us ever having a boring housebuying anecdote of our own.’
Celeste
‘Where is everyone? It’s like the Marie Celeste in here.’
Energy 4
‘Want to switch energy suppliers?’
Shareholder
‘In these straitened times, our shareholders need more money.’
Stalking
Thursday
School 2
‘Don’t even think about going to school in that skirt — you know you’re only allowed to wear it when you go down the pub.’
Dog 3
‘You know, I’m beginning to think the dog doesn’t like being locked up in here while we’re at work all day.’
Bopeep
Little Botox Peep and her ageing sheep