Jungle
‘I’m after some Nadine Dorries repellant.’
More cartoons
Thursday
Thursday
Reaper
‘I’m not a reaper any more. In the modern NHS, my title is Grim Pathway Co-ordinator.’
Relate
‘OK, Pip and Estella . . . ’
Tv 3
‘Oh, well, if there aren’t any programmes on about policemen chasing scantily clad, drunken fat girls around the centre of Cardiff, I’m off to bed.’
Tories
‘They say that the crew are all hopeless Tories, doomed to spend eternity wittering on about Europe and limits on abortion.’
Coma
‘Let’s see. Coma. Coma. Coma. Coma. Coma. Chameleon.’
Bond 2
‘Fruit juice, shaken not stirred . . . ’
Zoo
‘My mistake — petting zoo is next door along.’
Time
‘We have some time to kill.’
Neglect
‘We’re going to rush you straight through to intensive neglect.’
Left
Undecided
‘I’m undecided which way I would vote in an election — just as I’m undecided whether to let off the thermal nuclear device I’m building in my garage.’
Texting
‘Here endeth the texting’
Antiques
‘I’d say it’s Chinese.’
Undercover
‘We have very high standards here — all our staff are undercover reporters.’
Poppy 2
