Madeline Grant is The Spectator’s assistant editor and parliamentary sketch writer.
Despite the Prime Minister presumably going to bed each night, trotters crossed, eyes screwed up and wishing hard as if trying to reanimate Tinkerbell, the Mandelson scandal is not magically going to go away. Indeed, today MPs were granted an extensive chunk of parliamentary time to discuss it. Unsurprisingly, the PM swerved this particular treat.
In fairness, I suspect plenty of Tory MPs are looking for reasons to get out of party conference this year. East Wiltshire MP Danny Kruger – who this afternoon appeared at the Faragean elbow to defect to Reform – has probably found the single best, if drastic, get-out-clause available. Kruger isn’t the first MP to
‘This was Parliament at its best’, so went the inane and factually incorrect mantra of Kim Leadbeater as her Assisted Dying Bill made its way through the House of Commons. It did so on the back of intense duplicity about its safeguards by its sponsors and by the simple fact that the vast majority of
40 min listen
In this bonus episode Michael and Madeline tackle two extraordinary political stories. First, the dramatic resignation of Peter Mandelson as Britain’s US ambassador, following renewed scrutiny of his links to Jeffrey Epstein. Why did Keir Starmer take so long to act – and what does the debacle reveal about his leadership style? Then, across the
‘Oh, Mandy Well, you kissed me And stopped me from shaking And I need you today Oh, Mandy’ So sang Barry Manilow. I can imagine at one point, looking into his bathroom mirror, in the early days of his leadership, so did Sir Keir Starmer. Today, however, the government needed Mandy like a hole in
Statute 343.36 in the US state of Minnesota reads thus: ‘No person shall operate, run or participate in a contest, game, or other like activity, in which a pig, greased, oiled or otherwise, is released and wherein the object is the capture of the pig’. I hope, for the sake of the integrity of their
46 min listen
Michael Gove and Madeline Grant return with another episode of Quite right!, The Spectator’s new podcast promising sanity and common sense in an increasingly unhinged world. This week, they dissect Keir Starmer’s brutal reshuffle – from the ‘volcanic ejection’ of Angela Rayner to the rise of Shabana Mahmood, the ‘uncompromising toughie’ now in charge of
It’s always nice when the muses of tragedy and comedy seem to be working in perfect sync: nowhere is this truer than the Labour deputy leadership contest. It would genuinely be difficult to relate how many people have indicated that they are standing for the role so unceremoniously vacated by Big Ange. Candidacies have come
Reform had clearly planned the Campest Show On Earth for their conference this year. Sparklers, club anthems and strobe lights: imagine Sir Keith Joseph was in charge of your primary school disco and you get a sense of the vibe. Unfortunately for the budding impresarios of Reform, they were upstaged. Just as their conference was
Imagine a school assembly run by the most boring narcissists imaginable. Right – you’ve come close to picturing the first parliamentary business questions after recess. Lucy ‘Paraffin’ Powell, the woman who can always make a bad situation worse, began with a list of all the MPs who had married, had children, or otherwise managed not
It was taxes that eventually did for Al Capone. And Spiro Agnew. And Judy Garland. So now the taxman’s bell tolls for Big Ange – who has often presented herself as a sort of mix of all three of those figures. The hard-partying working-class girl turned union bruiser turned second most powerful politician in the
48 min listen
Michael Gove and Madeline Grant launch ‘Quite right!’, the new podcast from The Spectator that promises sanity and common sense in a world that too often lacks both. In their first episode, they take stock of a political summer dominated by Nigel Farage, a Labour government already facing mutiny, and the curious spectacle of Tory
The Green party’s leadership announcement was live streamed using a phone which seemed to be wrapped in clingfilm and held by someone who appeared to be suffering from delirium tremens. You may not have realised that the Greens were electing a new leader. You may not even have realised that they have a leader at
How many resets does it take to make a doom loop? In another attempt to work out what the problem with his government is – and with all the mirror salesmen in the capital presumably on holiday – Keir Starmer has done another mini-reshuffle. ‘Phase two of my government starts today’ he says in a
I suspect most of us long ago gave up on expecting any humility from our politicians – indeed, the less impressive they become and the more impotent it is clear that they actually are, the more their God complexes seem to flare up. It’s almost like they think humans are characters in a simulator game
In 1620, in the Staffordshire market town of Bilston, a teenage boy decided he didn’t much fancy going to school. Rather than resort to conventional methods, 13-year-old William Perry claimed that he was possessed by a demon. His symptoms included reacting with spasms to the reading of the first verse of St John’s Gospel and
The current head of energy policy in this country is Muppet-made-flesh Ed Miliband. While he makes a speciality of eye-catching policy announcements; notably playing a tuneless rendition of ‘Blowin’ in the Wind’ under a wind turbine, he is proving less capable of any form of actual policy implementation. His absolutism is increasingly bringing him into conflict
There are few more irritating features of the modern apparatchik’s lexicon than ‘lived experience’. It implies the existence of some ‘unlived experience’ which is an impossibility. That said, I’m perfectly prepared to believe that members of the current cabinet know what it is to be zombies. Yet, in at least one area, the ‘lived experience’
I wonder how No. 10 decides which minister is up for the ritual humiliation of the Today programme each morning. Russian roulette? An elaborate lottery? A competition – last person to spell out ‘TOOLMAKER’ using alphabetti spaghetti? Either way, today’s lucky victim for the airwaves was Home Office minister Dan Jarvis. The Minister made a
There are not, as far as I know, any Italian top-flight poker players. Italians are hardly renowned for their ability to suppress their facial expressions or conceal what they’re really thinking. In this regard they are unusually well-represented by their Premier, Giorgia Meloni. Her visible hatred of Emmanuel Macron is often conveyed through withering stares Upon
