Stubby
‘I can’t decide — these pencils are all as stubby as each other.’
The Spectator
Thursday
Barometer | 7 May 2015
Party packs Is it possible to form a stable coalition with more than one political party? The Conservative/Lib Dem coalition of 2010– 2015 was in fact unique in being the only British coalition featuring just two parties. — Lord Aberdeen’s coalition on 1852–55 was made up of 11 Whigs, six Peelites and one Radical, Sir
Letters | 7 May 2015
Bees vs Belgians Sir: To answer Rory Sutherland and Glen Weyl’s question: yes, everyone should vote and no, just because someone is more interested in politics, his opinion should not count more heavily (‘Plan Bee’, 2 May). Belgium has had compulsory voting for over a century. The troubles that follow every general election may seem
Bond villains
After working for Bill Clinton, the political strategist James Carville said he had changed his mind about where power really lies. ‘I used to think that if there was reincarnation, I wanted to come back as the President or the Pope,’ he said. ‘But now I would like to come back as the bond market.
Portrait of the week | 7 May 2015
Home The country went to the polls. David Cameron, the Conservative leader, prepared by going around with his sleeves rolled up. Ed Miliband, the Labour leader, said that his pledges had been cut into an eight-foot slab of limestone. Nick Clegg, the Liberal Democrat leader, took a bus for John O’Groats. Stuart Gulliver, the chief
The Spectator at war: War by poison
From ‘War by Poison’, The Spectator, 8 May 1915: THE nature of the gases by means of which the Germans have won undoubted local successes is gradually being ascertained, and the more we know of the gases the more brutal does the use of them appear. At first we heard them spoken of simply as
Chemical weapons
From ‘War by Poison’, The Spectator, 8 May 1915: By the consent of all men who are not savages, the use of poison is ruled out in war, and has been prohibited by custom for centuries. And war by poison is being practised not only in Europe; in German South-West Africa the Union troops, as we
Wednesday
The Spectator at war: Men and munitions
From ‘National Concentration’, The Spectator, 8 May 1915: The two great needs of the hour are more men and more munitions of war. We have got so to organize our forces that while more men are spared for the fighting line, there shall also be more men engaged, and efficiently engaged, in the manufacture of
Tuesday
The Spectator at war: American rights
From ‘News of the Week’, The Spectator, 8 May 1915: Last Saturday the American oil-tank vessel ‘Gulflight’ was torpedoed by a German submarine off Bishop’s Lighthouse. The captain died of shock and two seamen were drowned. Thus the critical event which the American Government foresaw has come to pass. On February 4th the American Government
Monday
Spectator competition: write a poem for the new royal baby (because the Poet Laureate won’t)
Carol Ann Duffy, the Poet Laureate, has again refused to write a poem to commemorate the birth of the new royal, Charlotte Elizabeth Diane. Rod Liddle has written his own poem about Duffy, asking why she took the job of Poet Laureate if she doesn’t like writing verse about royals. But this still leaves no one
The Spectator at war: Bravery in the air
From ‘News of the Week’, The Spectator, 8 May 1915: The papers of last Saturday published a particularly vivid account by the Canadian Record Officer of the stand of Canadians at Ypres. Such heroism as is revealed in this narrative deserves even more than the tribute we paid to the Canadians last week, Their feat
Sunday
The Spectator at war: Where men with splendid hearts may go
From ‘Rupert Brooke’, The Spectator, 1 May 1915: TO all men there is attractiveness in the combination of the soldier and the poet, and perhaps the combination gives a more satisfying pleasure to the countrymen of Sir Philip Sidney than to any other race. This is the reason why thousands of Englishmen mourn for Rupert
Saturday
The Spectator at war: The British Empire and the Muslim world
From ‘The Khalifate’, The Spectator, 1 May 1915: It seems that the Ottoman Empire is likely to crumble away, and in that event, whether it happens soon or late, the question of the Khalifate will cause many searchings of heart to the Mohammedan world. In an intimate and most important sense Britain is concerned in
Friday
The Spectator at war: Landing at Gallipoli
From ‘News of the Week’, The Spectator, 1 May 1915: The accounts from the Dardanelles are distinctly encouraging. On Tuesday the British portion of the Expeditionary Force landed on the point of the Gallipoli Peninsula—i.e., on the European side—while the French landed an the Asian side, and have fought a battle on the plain of
Thursday
Angel
‘…and we believe that each of us has an angel that looks after us.’
Son
‘My son? Oh, I’m afraid he’s no longer with us.’
Ed 2
‘You can have one of my kitchens!’
Care Home
‘It’ll never last.’
Mccoy 2
‘I say, didn’t you used to be A.P. McCoy?’
Graveyard
‘It’s how my beautiful assistant would have wanted it.’