Selfie 4

‘I was like, yay!’
‘Thank God, you’re just my wife’s lover. I thought you were the Inland Revenue!’
Shelfies
‘An impressive CV and confident interview — all rather let down by your inability to adjust your chair.’
‘We had to use the naughty step — she maxed out her credit card again.’
‘Now, where did I put my glasses?’
‘Remind me again how poor we want them to be…’
‘We have recently changed our intern selection process. Could you now please place the baby rabbit you’re holding on to your heads.’
‘Does sir dress to the left or to the right?’
‘I’ll say this for heather, it’s very moorish.’
‘Modern audiences don’t just sit and watch — we interact and post live comments.’
‘Not another old episode of Jihad’s Army?!’
‘What an amazing spectacle! Cyclists not on the pavement!’
Real help for those in pain Sir: The fickleness of existence is exemplified by the fact that being Tony Blair’s ex-flatmate puts you in the position of further eroding the moral fabric of the nation without ever having had stood for office. An advert for Charlie Falconer’s Assisted Dying Bill is rather cynically placed opposite
Public benefit Public sector unions held a strike over pay. How well are public-sector workers paid compared with their counterparts in the private sector? — Comparing jobs like for like, public sector workers earn between 2.2% and 3.1% more than private sector workers in April last year. — In the lowest-earning 5% of workers, public