Below is the text and full audio of Ed Balls’ conference speech given today in Brighton, as released by Labour’s press office. But there’s one section missing. It’s the one where Balls said:- listen to ‘Ed Balls: ‘I just thought it was a surprisingly small towel’’ on Audioboo
listen to ‘Len McCluskey: ‘If our party is to have a future it must speak for working people and organised labour’’ on Audioboo
listen to ‘Nigel Farage’s speech at the Ukip conference’ on Audioboo
‘My story? I didn’t go with the new carpet’
‘What do you mean “what’s the problem”? You’ve got a bar in your classroom!’
‘No, I don’t have an eating disorder. The reason I’m not touching it is because you’re a lousy cook.’
‘I now pronounce you man and secretary.’
‘How sweet. He used to hate seeing his grandma but now he wants to come round here all the time.’
‘Hey — I can hear the sea.’
‘Wake up! You’re sleep-pushing again.’
‘No, that’s not a cutaway — I just had trouble getting the security tag off.’
‘My tax-avoidance scheme will fund my death-avoidance scheme.’
