Erotica
‘Thank you for letting us read Poppy the Woodland Rabbit. Unfortnately, it’s not really our sort of thing’

‘Thank you for letting us read Poppy the Woodland Rabbit. Unfortnately, it’s not really our sort of thing’
‘The goldfish wants feeding, dear..’
‘I feel so empty now the children have left.’
‘When you said you were “doing a nude”, I thought you wanted me to take my clothes off.’
‘He was everything I was looking for in a man — which set alarm bells ringing straight away.’
The outlaw Ned Kelly no longer got lost in the outback now that he had a satnav
‘How absolutely hideous — it’ll go perfectly with those shoes I never wear.’
‘It’s the latest beauty treatment — combined aromatherapy and full-body wax.’
‘Bring out yer Ed.’
‘Oh dear — that sausage I ate is about to do a U-turn.’
‘That’s the wife or the mistress, I forget which.’
Why we joined Sir: I was astonished by the assertion made by Wyn Grant (Letters, 21 September) that ‘the postwar surge in Conservative party membership was due to people rebuilding their social lives after the war’. Where did that idea come from? I grew up in south London before and during the war. I recall
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listen to ‘Ed Miliband’s speech to the Labour conference’ on Audioboo