At least my bowl’s in one piece
‘I may not live in a palace, but at least my bowl’s in one piece.’
Wilbur
Wednesday
Wednesday
January sales
‘I love the January sales!’
Monday
Overpromised and underdelivered
‘I’m afraid Santa may have overpromised and underdelivered.’
Bingeing
Merry Christmas!
‘Merry Christmas!’
Hopefully, many will choose heating over eating this year
‘Hopefully, many will choose heating over eating this year.’
Friday
Netflix and spill
‘Netflix and spill?’
That’s a perfectly good egg
‘That’s a perfectly good egg that could have been thrown at the King.’
Tuesday
Train strikes could ruin xmas
‘Bah! We wanted to do that.’
Wednesday
Stuff of mythology
‘I thought they were the stuff of mythology too, but apparently there are people who like Matt Hancock.’
Thursday
The cat’s dragged in an injured bird
‘The cat’s dragged in an injured bird.’
Thursday
All the gay footballers should boycott the World Cup!
‘All the gay footballers should boycott the World Cup!’
Since I stung Matt Hancock
‘Since I stung Matt Hancock the phone has not stopped ringing.’
Thursday
Our first date
‘You’re seriously suggesting a walk in the park for our first date?’
Thursday
Qatar will need 10,000 litres of water
Our asylum system is broken
‘Well, the lunatics are running it.’
Thursday
Latest Tory leadership election
Efficiency savings
‘That’s one area they could make some efficiency savings…’