Q. I am soon to entertain a house party on a sporting estate. We took the same house last year and all went well, except the housekeeper complained to the owner that we’d let our guests ‘tramp through the house in their trainers and boots’. This was a misrepresentation but it’s true that the odd guest, dashing back to their room for a mobile, might have failed to spend five minutes unlacing and relacing boots. We don’t want to be banned from the property in future so, given human nature, how can I enforce the boots-off rule this year without causing bad vibes?
– V.P., Malmesbury
A. You can easily sidestep this nuisance by buying multiple packs of disposable surgical overshoes and leaving these on prominent display in the boot room area. It takes no more than ten seconds to snap a pair onto existing footwear. Wujun sells 100 pairs for £6.69.
Q. My husband is undergoing very unpleasant chemotherapy and is not feeling great – as I told an old friend who rang to ask if she and her husband could come and stay the night for an event in our part of Cornwall. She said that wouldn’t matter as they’d be out most of the time and would hardly see him. She has now rung back saying that her group has expanded to seven. And they want to stay two nights. I protested that this would certainly be way too much for my husband – to which she replied that he could ‘just stay in his room’. We don’t know why she is being so grossly insensitive but I was so astonished that I didn’t actually say no. Neither of us has the energy for seven people, let alone for making seven beds. How can I put them off?
– Name and address withheld
A. Identify an Airbnb in the area and send this woman the link. Explain your husband’s doctor has expressly forbidden the disruption involved in having seven guests. Moreover, concerned friends of your husband have agreed to crowdfund the Airbnb if the woman feels her party can’t cover the cost. Can she let you know how she’d like to proceed? If she demands the crowdfunding option, make it clear the funds will be from your own purse.
Q. I met the most dazzlingly wonderful young man at a house party and I would like to matchmake him with my 18-year-old daughter (he is 21). I don’t know how I can do this without seeming Mrs Bennety or pervy, but I want to snap him up before someone else does. – Name and address withheld
A. You might try to orchestrate some tutorial sessions so he could help her revise for A-levels.
Write to Dear Mary at dearmary@spectator.co.uk
Comments