Q. I have invited some younger friends to stay with me at a family house in Spain. Among the party will be an excellent young fellow who I sense is attracted to my niece, who will also be joining us for a few days. Were I to ask if she is interested, she would think such a question ‘gross’ – but she should be, because he is an all-round star. Like so many of his age, though, he has a somewhat dithering and unconfident manner. Given that it will be too hot to dance, any thoughts about how I can help things move forward between them? They are both single.
– Name and address withheld
A. At an opportune moment, having engineered a chat, sit the pair down on a sofa and hand them your mobile preloaded with a relevant short podcast on the topic you have been discussing. Produce old-style tethered earphones for them to share, with one end in each ear, so they have to sit close to one another. The enforced proximity will clarify any latent reciprocal chemistry and facilitate a private overture for fuller intimacy.
Q. I was sitting opposite a young woman and her mother on a train and it was clear that the girl had impetigo but that neither party realised she had this infectious complaint, as they were describing it as ‘sun blisters’. I didn’t know how, without seeming patronising or grand (I can’t help my voice), to tell them she had this condition associated with poor hygiene. How could I have warned her, Mary?
– L.P., Much Wenlock, Shrop
A. You might have said, ‘I’m so sorry to interrupt but there’s been an amazing coincidence…’ and then told them that your best friend had the same rash a few weeks ago and she too thought it was sun blisters until she happened to meet a pharmacist in a checkout queue and this man had been clever enough to identify it as impetigo and tell her what treatment was needed.
Q. I have moved to the country, but due to travelling am unable to attend our local church regularly. I want to support the church, though, so whenever I do go to a service there I put in a large denomination note when the collection plate comes round, to represent missed weeks as well as that week. I am aware it could look flashy or undermining of the donations of the other congregants, but there are no envelopes and hence no way of doing it discreetly. What can I do instead?
– C.W., Hereford
A. Why not take a tip from the late H.M. Queen Elizabeth and arrive at church with a bank note ironed and folded into a small square so as to obscure its precise worth until it is unfurled later in the sacristry?
Write to Dear Mary at dearmary@spectator.co.uk
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