Monday
What a morning! Was having coffee with Jed’s new PA, Janice. Lovely lady. V spiritual — although some might say a bit severe-looking with the shaved head. Anyway, as Nigel says, she’s ‘taken a shine to me’. She tells me things that are troubling her and today she told me something’s going on which she doesn’t think is ethical. It seems Dave has been getting coaching from ‘a senior Labour figure’. She made me swear a dozen different oaths — including one on Sesame’s forthcoming dressage trials — before she told me who it was. Suffice to say that when she told me the name I swallowed a piece of mini muffin down into my windpipe. It was dreadful. The whole of Starbucks was in panic. Janice screamed at everyone to stand back, leapt on top of me from behind and performed a manoeuvre she said she learned in the TA. I don’t know what was meant to happen but a piece of mini muffin shot out of my nose and landed on a gorgeous guy from the Institute for Fiscal Studies who was sitting at the next table. Think I would rather have choked to death.
Also she’s broken one of my ribs. So am writing this from a real live A&E department. I must say, it’s v efficient. Only had to wait ten minutes before being shown into a room with Fairtrade coffee. How on earth could we improve on that?!
Tuesday
Am shattered. Turns out the ten-minute wait was just to get on to the waiting list for the real wait. Followed by a wait for the wait for the X-ray queue. This is outrageous. Surely some sort of strict waiting-time target is needed? Must tell Mr Lansley.
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