In defence of February

Everyone has their own most loved and hated months. While for Chaucer, Browning and others April was a time of joyful rebirth, it was of course for Eliot ‘the cruellest month’. Still, February tends to get a bad rap from everybody. It manages to be both the shortest and longest month of the year. In theory the days are getting longer, and yet the darkness of the previous night and the next morning blur, making for a grim nocturnal existence. It doesn’t matter if you’re a night owl or a morning lark, in February you’re commuting from work in the dark.

Still, better than midwinter isn’t it? Hardly. The glamorous, festive part of the season is a mulled wine-blurred distant memory. And while January is tough, there is at least a back-to-school feeling in the air and a buoyancy from new year’s resolutions not yet broken. There is something nice about the ascetic regimen of that spartan month, like a bracing Boxing Day walk after turkey excess. But come February the strict abstinence turns to a dour abstemiousness, with only Shrove Tuesday’s pancakes to interrupt the monotony of the gloomy days until spring.

In February’s defence, and to quote a Missourian journalist whose deadpan report from a dreary St Louis goes viral at this time each year, it is at least ‘an honest month’ that ‘doesn’t hold up life any better than it really is’. I would further venture that it has redeeming qualities. The sadistic souls that inflict both Dry January and Veganuary on us have had their bloodlust sated by a month of national suffering and reluctantly allow us to enjoy ourselves again, so meat and booze is back on the menu. And this year there are at least 21 happy February days to enjoy one’s vices before the start of Lent. 

Of course, February has Valentine’s Day too – though I’m not convinced anyone genuinely likes it, except perhaps the restaurateurs for whom it’s a welcome boost, and Thorntons whom it appears to be single-handedly keeping alive. Romance will never die so long as there’s rum and raisin fudge to be had. The month used to be livened up by Kissing Friday two days after Ash Wednesday, when school-age boys were allowed to kiss girls without being rejected (in Sileby, Leicestershire, if a girl resisted a kiss, the boy was allowed to pinch her bottom). Needless to say, the tradition has died out.

So, what reason is there to be anything other than crushingly depressed in February? Well, there’s the rugby of course – the Six Nations kicks off on Saturday 4 February – and below are a few other things going on that might help to keep your spirits up. And don’t forget – even if you regard February as beyond saving, at least there’s only 28 days of it to endure. Thank heavens it’s not a leap year.

Europe’s largest viking festival, York

I have always been intrigued by battle re-enactment enthusiasts. I can’t decide whether taking part would be like being an extra in Braveheart standing in the cold while Mel Gibson has another go at his rousing speech, or a more enjoyable version of paintballing. Anyway, the nine-day Jorvik Viking Festival attracts some 40,000 people to York from 11 to 19 February to celebrate the city’s Norse heritage. There are live battle re-enactments, combat performances, wrestling and much more. Sounds more fun than the gym.

Great British Beer Festival, Burton upon Trent

Run by the Campaign for Real Ale, this winter beer festival takes place from 16 to 18 February and will feature hundreds of cask and craft beers (plus ciders, perries and gin) alongside food and entertainment. Yes, drinking outside in the summer is nice, but this feels perfectly timed to give us beer cheer when we need it most. Tickets are selling very fast – only Saturday still available – so snap them up quickly. 

London Classic Car Show, Olympia

Running from 24 to 26 February at Olympia in West London, the show brings together dealers, manufacturers, restorers and car clubs. This year there’ll be a live 100-item auction on the penultimate day alongside the usual displays. So whether you want to mark 60 years of the Porsche 911 or 70 years of the Corvette, or are just looking for a way to escape London’s Ulez, it’s all happening here.

ReBalance, Bath

What do you get when you combine the glorious heritage of 2,000-year-old baths with a contemporary fad for ‘wellness’? A three-week (7 to 26 February) ‘festival of wellbeing’ including everything from ‘Spiritual movement and meditation in Bath Abbey’ and ‘Aquasana’ in the thermal baths to ‘Posture and pastries’ business breakfasts and a three-day guest pass to Fitness First. It’s hard not to laugh, but this is a city in celebration of having been awarded a second Unesco accreditation in 2021 for its spa water as part of the Great Spas of Europe project (the city as a whole was designated a World Heritage Site back in 1987). It’s a worthy accolade and so there’s never been a better time to take the plunge and try Vinyasa flow yoga. Go on.