Society

Thursday

Alexandra Coghlan

Lessons from the front

Christmas, for many people, begins at exactly 3 p.m. on Christmas Eve. It’s the moment when everything stops, frantic present-wrapping, mince-pie making and tree-decorating ceases and calm briefly takes hold. The reason? A single boy treble whose voice, clear and fragile as glass, pierces through the chaos with those familiar words: ‘Once in Royal David’s city/ Stood a lowly cattle shed…’. The service of Nine Lessons and Carols from King’s College, Cambridge, and its annual broadcast on BBC Radio 4 is as essential a part of contemporary Christmas folklore as stockings and Santa Claus, plum pudding and presents. Ageless and timeless, it seems as though there must always have been

Jonathan Ray Jonathan Ray

Wine Club 10 December

Tricky time of year this, with the festivities hoving into view. Never easy for anyone, least of all those of us who suffer from Christmas Affected Doom, Depression and Despondency (CADDAD), a ghastly affliction about which I’ve written at length elsewhere so won’t bore you with now. Suffice to say that it is a dreadful burden, often hereditary (invariably passing down the male line with females rarely affected), often undiagnosed and rarely properly treated. Symptoms include a rise in blood pressure caused by the sight of supermarket Christmas puddings and mince pies in early September, a throbbing in the ears upon being invited to have a ‘Cool Yule’, a lurch

Katy Balls Katy Balls

Hangovers

Although drinking excessive levels of alcohol is up there with Olympic cycling and democracy as things the British excel at, the same cannot be said for dealing with the aftermath. Over the festive season we splash more than £2 billion on trips to the pub as punters take exhortations to have a merry Christmas a bit too literally. But our subsequent hangovers cost the economy almost £260 million through sick days and a lack of productivity. A night on the tiles tends to leave people feeling a little defenceless the next day. However, for those of us who have no option but to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in the morning,

Roger Alton Roger Alton

Ten questions of sport

1. Can anyone explain why England wore dark blue, not white, for the autumn international against Argentina, just as they did against Fiji? Is there anybody in the whole country, other than the marketing department at the Rugby Football Union, who thinks it is a good idea to change England shirts for no other reason than to fleece the public whose children might want to wear one? Why don’t England stick to their proper colours: would the Springboks change, or Australia, or would the All Blacks become the All Purples? Seven different shirts in two years! Come off it.   2. Is the ongoing spat between Ben Stokes and Virat

Aidan Hartley

Wild life | 8 December 2016

 Kenya I realised I had fallen from grace when we were dropped from the Queen’s birthday party guest list at the British High Commission in Nairobi. I wondered what offence I had caused to the recently arrived plenipotentiary. I worried that it was because one evening, while jogging in the diplomatic suburb of Muthaiga, I had passed him going at a slack pace and barked, ‘Giddy up!’ I have always been so fond of our British HCs. I picture them to be like Waugh’s ambassador to Azania, Sir Samson, less engrossed with unfolding revolutions outside than with playing with his rubber dinosaur at bath time, which he sat on ‘and

Christopher Howse

Christmas Quiz | 8 December 2016

Say so In 2016, who said: 1. ‘Brexit means Brexit.’ 2. ‘We’ve got some leaders of some fantastically corrupt countries coming to Britain. Nigeria and Afghanistan, possibly the two most corrupt countries in the world.’ 3. ‘The Prime Minister — I should be pleased about this I suppose — seems to think he should be in Chippenham, paying homage to the town where I was born.’ 4. (On discontinuing his Twitter account for six months): ‘Too many people have peed in the pool.’ 5. ‘The UK is going to be in the back of the queue.’ 6. ‘Son of a whore, I will curse you in that forum.’ 7. ‘Watching

Bruce Anderson

Wines of the times

The other day, I had lunch with the grandest person I know. Forget 1066: Adrian Ziani de Ferranti can trace his Venetian ancestors to the time when St Theodore was the city’s patron saint and St Mark’s corpse still reposed in Alexandria. Ziani Doges were buried under the crypt of San Zaccaria centuries before Bellini painted that church’s sublime altarpiece. John Julius Norwich believes that it is the finest painting in Venice. Were I entitled to an opinion, it might go in favour of the Titian Assumption in the Frari, but we are talking about works which transcend mere admiration: works of mastery, glory and joy. Anyway, the Zianis were

Rory Sutherland Rory Sutherland

The rich aren’t so different any more

The traditional orange at the bottom of a Christmas stocking dates to a time when this was the only orange a child might receive all year. Earlier, in the 17th century, a single pineapple might cost the equivalent of £5,000 today; like pepper in the Middle Ages, pineapple ownership was confined to royalty and the super-rich. Yet last week I spoke to someone who had worked in a food-waste processing plant. She said their worst nightmare was when one of the supermarket chains offered two-for-one on pineapples; so many people would throw away their unwanted second pineapple that the extra acidity played havoc with the chemical workings of the plant.

Christopher Howse

The answers | 8 December 2016

Say so 1. Theresa May 2. David Cameron (overheard on air, speaking to the Queen) 3. Jeremy Corbyn 4. Stephen Fry 5. President Barack Obama of the United States, warning against Brexit 6. President Rodrigo Duterte of the Philippines about President Barack Obama at an Asean summit 7. Gerry Adams, the Sinn Fein politician 8. Hillary Clinton 9. President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe, arriving at Harare airport from Dubai, countering rumours of his death 10. Lord Heseltine, of his mother’s dog. Beastliness 1. Beavers 2. Lynxes 3. Eagles 4. Cod 5. Sperm whales 6. A gorilla 7. Yorkshire terriers 8. Tomatoes 9. Donkeys 10. Jeremy. Odd 1. Japan 2. President Hassan

Lucy Vickery

Let’s twist

In Competition No. 2977 you were invited to submit a Christmas carol with a topical twist. ‘In the bleak midwinter’ just about captures the general tenor of the entry, although George Simmers injected a lighter note with his invitation to ‘Deck Ed Balls with boughs of holly…’ and W.J. Webster, too, was looking on the relatively bright side: ‘God rest ye merry, gentlemen,/ Let nothing you dismay;/ The world is not on course to end/ That January day…’ Commendations go to Albert Black, Gordan Macintyre, Paul Carpenter, Tracy Davidson and Ian White.The winners, printed below, take £25 each. And the festive fiver is Martin Parker’s.   Merry Christmas, one and

Raymond Keene

London classic

The annual London Classic is now underway at Olympia. Understandably Magnus Carlsen, after his exertions in New York, is not competing. Nevertheless, the line-up is extremely powerful, consisting of Maxime Vachier-Lagrave, Fabiano Caruana, Vladimir Kramnik, Lev Aronian, Hikaru Nakamura, Wesley So, Anish Giri, Viswanathan Anand, Veselin Topalov and our own Michael Adams. This week, a game and puzzle from previous encounters between the contestants. I have published this game before, but fresh computer analysis has revealed some exciting new possibilities.   Anand-Vachier-Lagrave: London Classic, London 2015, Sicilian Defence   1 e4 c5 2 Nf3 d6 3 d4 cxd4 4 Nxd4 Nf6 5 Nc3 a6 6 Be2 e5 7 Nb3 Be7

Wednesday

Mike Fotis

Challenger banks are failing to deliver better banking

Just over a year ago I believed that new challenger banks were on the edge of glory, about to kick off an era of better and fairer banking for everybody. In an article for ResPublica I wrote: ‘When real colour is injected into the financial services industry, consumers will be better served and ultimately empowered to engage.’ New challenger banks were meant to deliver this colour, and to better serve customers. Alas, I wrong. New banks are simply not delivering better banking. These new challenger banks are important because they’ve been held up as the white knights of banking. The story goes something like this: more competition will force bloated

Ed West Ed West

‘British values’ are a load of old codswallop

Sometimes a combination of news stories crop up that so perfectly sum up the spirit of the age, its absurdities and hypocrisies, that there ought to be a name for it. This week, for instance, I learned that the Home Office had barred three Iraqi and Syrian bishops from entering the country, the same department that quite merrily welcomes some of the most unpleasant hate preachers from the Islamic world. Elsewhere, there was also a report about racial and religious segregation in schools and the need to teach something called ‘British values’ to children to help them integrate. And finally, the winner of the country’s most prestigious art award was announced, beating competition from

Helen Nugent

Workers, renting, pensioners and scams

More than 7 million Britons, including 2.6 million children, are living in poverty despite being part of working households, according to a report commissioned by the Joseph Rowntree Foundation. The study says that deprivation is increasingly connected to the high cost and insecurity of private rented accommodation. The Guardian reports that ‘disability is increasingly linked to the changing nature of poverty. If the costs of disability are taken into account, half of those in poverty are either disabled or living with a disabled person.’ Renting The Telegraph reports that the Royal Institution of Chartered Surveyors (Rics) wants the Government to set up its own database of renters as an alternative to credit checks. Under the proposals by

Tuesday

Ruth Sunderland

Banks are doing too little, too late to combat online fraud

If the movie Bonnie and Clyde with Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway is on TV again this Christmas, it might act as a reminder that the days when bank robbers used guns and getaway cars have been consigned to history. Nowadays, thieves are armed with broadband, not bullets. They don’t need a getaway car because they don’t even need to be in the same country to clean out the coffers. Online banking is convenient, and often the best interest rates are available on internet accounts only – but it’s also a bonanza for fraudsters. The banks are improving the situation for their customers, but it’s too little, too late. They

Helen Nugent

Record spending, Bank of England, spread betting and housing hotspots

As predicted, shoppers worked themselves into a frenzy during November’s Black Friday, new figures reveal. But this year it was internet sales that soared. According to the British Retail Consortium, a record one in four pounds was spent online during Black Friday. The Telegraph reports that ‘online sales of non-food items, which includes homewares and clothing, represented 27.6 per cent of all total non-food sales in the UK during November, against 25.3 per cent the year before.’ All told, about £1.23 billion was spent online on Black Friday alone, according to retail analysts at IMRG, while 64 per cent of purchases were made on mobile devices, according to data from ChannelAdvisor. Bank

Monday

Jayne Dowle

There’s no shame in being a Santa Scrooge

In another world, I would sit down at the beginning of December with a notepad and pen and make a really organised Christmas shopping list. What I actually do is commence the proceedings by searching every drawer in the house for forgotten gift vouchers. I usually start with the children’s rooms. My son and daughter, despite being brought up to count every penny, hardly ever use these things. My daughter’s school probably thinks it is setting her off on a lifetime of worthy pursuits with a £5 voucher for WH Smith awarded for good work over the year. She, however, shoves the thing in with her socks and promptly forgets

Hilary Spurling

Spectator Books of the Year: The forgotten genius of Rose Hilton

I choose Ian Collins’s Rose Hilton (Lund Humphries, £35), a remarkable artist elbowed aside, like so many women of her generation, by a more established, much better known and far more forceful husband. Roger Hilton reckoned there was room for only one artist in their household, and that was him. This handsome, inviting and splendidly illustrated volume follows Rose as she makes her own way, with a lot of help from Matisse and not much from Roger, to emerge after his death as an authoritative colourist of great strength and warmth in her own right. Catrine Clay’s Labyrinths (Collins, £20) tells a parallel story from 50 years earlier, following Emma

Nicholas Farrell

Italy is in desperate need of a saviour

Matteo Renzi lost his constitutional reform referendum – and his job – for a simple reason: too many Italians from across the political spectrum opposed the Florentine and what he represented. What he stood for is easy to see from the names of those who gave him their wholehearted support: Jean-Claude Juncker, Angela Merkel, Mario Draghi, François Hollande, the Financial Times, and, of course, outgoing American President Barack Obama, who made him guest of honour at his last White House state dinner in October and described him as ‘bold’, ‘progressive’ and ‘promising’. God – perhaps – knows who will be the new Prime Minister of Italy. There have been more than

Douglas Murray

The Casey review highlights a major problem in British society

Dame Louise Casey’s review into ‘opportunity and integration’ is finally out.  Commissioned a year ago by the then Prime Minister, David Cameron, and finished some time ago, there were fears that this review would remain ‘on ice’.  Casey – who also led the government’s review of the Rotherham child-grooming scandal – is nobody’s idea of a push-over and the new government was said to have been wary about releasing the report in its current state. One can see why.  Although it will take some days to read and absorb the entire 200-page document, it is clear from the executive summary that Casey has pulled few punches.  In particular, she has highlighted