Wilbur | The Spectator columnists & writers

‘Chesham and Amersham by-election…’

Chesham and Amersham by-election

‘Chesham and Amersham by-election…’

Chesham and Amersham by-election

G7 head home

G7 head home

‘I’ll never understand the rules of the game!’

Rules of the game

‘I’ll never understand the rules of the game!’

Rules of the game

We’re not migrants

‘We’re not migrants — we’re just trying to get back from Portugal!’

We’re not migrants

‘We’re not migrants — we’re just trying to get back from Portugal!’

‘The commute won’t be great but it’s all we can afford.’

The commute won’t be great

‘The commute won’t be great but it’s all we can afford.’

The commute won’t be great

‘Prince Charles is calling it a “Treebilee”. I tried to talk him out of that...’

Treebilee

‘Prince Charles is calling it a “Treebilee”. I tried to talk him out of that...’

Treebilee

Pop the question

Pop the question

‘It would have been wiser not to travel.’

It would have been wiser

‘It would have been wiser not to travel.’

It would have been wiser

Nothing for ages

‘Nothing for ages, then two come along at once.’

Nothing for ages

‘Nothing for ages, then two come along at once.’

‘Is this allowed under current Covid restrictions?’

Is this allowed under current Covid restrictions?

‘Is this allowed under current Covid restrictions?’

Is this allowed under current Covid restrictions?

Save the Labour party!

‘And that’s how you save the Labour party!’

Save the Labour party!

‘And that’s how you save the Labour party!’

‘I’m glad he wasn’t in Line of Duty. There would have been a riot.’

Line of Duty

‘I’m glad he wasn’t in Line of Duty. There would have been a riot.’

Line of Duty

‘To be fair, the government is pulling out all the stops to help meet it.’

All the stops

‘To be fair, the government is pulling out all the stops to help meet it.’

All the stops

New school bully

New school bully

New school bully

New school bully

All about money

‘I hope professional football doesn’t become all about money!’

All about money

‘I hope professional football doesn’t become all about money!’

‘Are we allowed to bring a bottle?’

Are we allowed to bring a bottle

‘Are we allowed to bring a bottle?’

Are we allowed to bring a bottle

‘I’m feeling intense pressure to find five friends.’

Find five friends

‘I’m feeling intense pressure to find five friends.’

Find five friends

Spring?

Spring?

Throwing eggs

Throwing eggs

Devils

Devils

‘I think your father’s hoping he’ll never have to hug anyone again.’

I think your father’s hoping

‘I think your father’s hoping he’ll never have to hug anyone again.’

I think your father’s hoping

‘Another vaccine?!’

Another vaccine

‘Another vaccine?!’

Another vaccine

Is there a problem with our track and trace system, Pooh?

‘Is there a problem with our track and trace system, Pooh?’

Is there a problem with our track and trace system, Pooh?

‘Is there a problem with our track and trace system, Pooh?’

‘I was looking forward to Glastonbury.’

Looking forward to Glastonbury

‘I was looking forward to Glastonbury.’

Looking forward to Glastonbury

Cellar flooded!

‘Thank goodness we got everything important out before the cellar flooded!’

Cellar flooded!

‘Thank goodness we got everything important out before the cellar flooded!’

‘Are we sure this bloke’s legit?’

Odd jab man

‘Are we sure this bloke’s legit?’

Odd jab man

‘I look back on when I went to school as the best days of my life.’

I look back on when I went to school

‘I look back on when I went to school as the best days of my life.’

I look back on when I went to school

‘And in the interests of balance, we also wish you a thoroughly miserable Christmas.’

Miserable Christmas

‘And in the interests of balance, we also wish you a thoroughly miserable Christmas.’

Miserable Christmas

We can’t manage a whole turkey

We can’t manage a whole turkey