Q. My husband never wants to go out to lunch on a day when he could be gardening but he has grudgingly accepted a wonderful forthcoming local event that I’m very keen to attend myself. Now I find from a fellow guest that our host is planning on seating him next to a woman who (she says) is ‘one of his biggest fans’. The feeling is not mutual – in fact, if my husband found out about this seating plan, he would definitely refuse to come. Yet now that I know about this, it would be disloyal and deceitful of me not to tell him. How can I resolve this without causing offence to our host?
– Name and address withheld
A. Confide in an influential third party that the leaked seating plan is causing anxiety for you. You have always had an irrational but nagging suspicion that your husband carries a torch for this woman and you’re dreading the consequences of their spending a few hours seated only inches away from each other. Beg the third party to discreetly urge the host to alter the place à table.
Q. A week or two back I wanted to catch the Piccadilly line from South Kensington. As you may know, from the bottom of the escalator you have to go up about 15 steps to the platform. Realising there was a train waiting, I bounded up the steps, ran across the platform, jumped up into the packed carriage, and the doors snapped shut behind me. I smiled proudly at the attractive young lady I found myself face to face with, and she smiled back.
Comments
Join the debate for just $5 for 3 months
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for $5.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just $5 for 3 monthsAlready a subscriber? Log in