Presidential pardons
‘What are all these dogs doing out during lockdown?’
‘Did I ever tell you of the time I was cast adrift on a sea of paperwork?’
‘The free school meal is so bad my daughter refuses to photograph it.’
‘Well, here I am, Puss, all dressed up and vaccinated with no place to go.’
‘No difference. I’ve always WFH’
‘I told you this journey wasn’t absolutely necessary.’
‘Look Joolz, a new coffee shop.’
‘We moved to the catchment area of an excellent private tutor...’
‘Oh, no! Rates are going up.’
‘No thanks, I’m too tiered.’
‘Write an essay entitled “What I didn’t do on my holidays”.’
‘Hi honey, I’m still home!’
‘Don’t catch it!’
‘That’s saved me from one of my new year’s resolutions…’