Homeowner please help
‘To be honest, the job’s soul-destroying.’
‘It doesn’t do anything.’
‘We had to remove the Hall of Mirrors because of complaints about body shaming.’
‘... and my thanks to Boris Johnson, without whom...’
‘Sorry, I’ve already sold my soul to the Saudis.’
‘What a day.’
‘We’re here to claim Universal Basic Income.’
‘You’ve got balls – I like that in a woman.’
‘There must be someone who is interested in my unwanted sexual attention.’
‘He’s keen on protecting single sex spaces.’
‘Dad’s always been a strong supporter of inclusivity... he hates everyone, equally.’
‘They’ve all had work done!’
‘Oh Roger, you know how shellfish disagrees with me.’
‘We really hoped we’d be Tories by now.’
‘Gingerbread doesn’t appeal to the kiddies any more.’