Strictly no picnics
More cartoons
Thursday
Footballers’ pay reduced
‘I fear our pay could be reduced from obscene to disgusting.’
Not a request
‘It’s not a request, it’s an instruction.’
We’ve had reports
‘We’ve had reports that the sun has got his hat on and he’s coming out to play.’
If you find any PPE
‘If you find any PPE you get to keep it.’
Saturday
Mini market
They haven’t got any of the basics
‘They haven’t got any of the basics — beer, wine, gin, vodka...’
Home school run
Keep two metres away from those Easter eggs
‘Keep two metres away from those Easter eggs.’
Runners keep distance
Go home. Your journey is not essential
‘Go home. Your journey is not essential.’
Lunge stretch press
‘Lunge… stretch… press…’
Good news, the end is nigh
‘Good news!’
Saturday
No change there then
‘No change there then.’
One form of exercise
‘One form of exercise a day?!!’
My tweet about Covid-19 has gone viral
‘My tweet about Covid-19 has gone viral.’
Closed for the emergency
‘I thought they were key workers.’
